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Friday, August 29, 2008

Guilty of mouse murder

I checked the trap around 7 AM today. I could see, in the shadows behind the fridge, that the yellow bar had dropped, meaning the trap had been sprung. I turned the light on, and there was a poor little mouse in the trap, dead. We all know mice are dirty, stinking vermin. They're destructive, and spread diseases that are harmful, even fatal, to humans. So why do I feel so guilty? Heck, I even feel guilty every time I mash a fly, and I hate those things more than mice. Oh well, it's done now.

One amusing little aside to the mouse incident, arrived in the form of yet another Wayne-ism. I told my dopey cousin about the mouse. Guess what Wayne said? 'Aw. At least it's only a cute little mouse. It could be worse'. 'Yes', I said. 'In a couple of weeks time, when one mouse has become a dozen, it'll be a lot worse'.

Wayne has only owned one pet in his whole life. Many years ago, he had a little pet mouse called Ifor Bach (Welsh for Little Ivor). Well, Wayne used to let Ifor Bach out of his cage, to enjoy a run around the bedsit he then lived in. The trouble with that, is that Wayne would then have great trouble locating and re-caging Ifor Bach. So, inevitably, the mouse vanished one day, a week or so before Wayne was due to move to a new flat. He assumed the mouse had exited via the window, and perished. So, he headed off to his new flat.

About a month later, Wayne and I were in the Uplands Tavern, during the days when it was known as Streets. His ex-landlord came up to us. 'What was that mess you left in the bedsit, Wayne? There was even a bl**dy mouse running around in there'. Luckily, the ex-landlord realised it was a pet mouse, caught it and found it a home. Or so he said. I'm not so sure, as I always thought that man had very shifty eyes. Still, I can't condemn him, mouse murderer as I am.

I'm now so paranoid, I'm going to re-bait and re-set the trap tonight. I'm not expecting to find another mouse in rigor mortis. Blinking well hope not, anyway. If I do, I will officially declare myself a skank, and have a sign made for my front door, which says 'Welcome to Skanksville'. Funny how one little mouse can leave someone feeling so paranoid and unclean.

Oh well. Laters....

1 comment:

Dragonstar said...

Oh dear! Well, if the mouse was too dim to escape when it could, then it's just too bad.

 
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