My life in the war zone

My neighbourhood is under siege once more. Rockets and other missiles scream overhead, before exploding. Shells explode and shake the whole building. Screams echo around the streets as each missile hits its target. No, this isn't Bazra, Tora Bora or Gaza. It's a suburban street in the UK. But it's that godawful time of year again, when louts indiscriminately detonate huge fireworks, from around 5pm every evening, until the wee small hours. Currently, there's an explosion every 30-45 seconds.

When will the government finally get its act together and ban sales of fireworks to the general public? The wretched things are dangerous. They're filled with gunpowder, for pity's sake. I would be arrested if I walked down the street with a loaded gun. So why, despite it being illegal, are the police not stopping kids from firing off these missiles? My cats are terrified. Some fool of a neighbour has obviously gone out and left their little dog outside. The poor thing's whimpering in terror. No unlicensed person should be allowed to possess these lethal weapons, and it should be a criminal offence to do so. Ban the legalized bombs!

P.S. I love a good fireworks display. I just hate guerrilla displays, put on by louts, simply to cause nuisance and distress. If I had my way, I would strap giant rockets to their arses, and take great delight in sending them into orbit, on a one-way trip.