I bin naughty, Mam

I've just discovered something all dog owners should know. It is NOT a good idea to forget to empty the kitchen waste caddy at night. A couple of weeks ago, the council delivered some new bins to encourage householders to save their kitchen waste for composting. So, since then, I've been putting all compostable waste into a little paper-lined caddy in the kitchen, and emptying it into a bigger, outdoor bin at night. I forgot to do it last night.

Let's fast-forward to this morning. I got up, to be met by a gleeful, but slightly sheepish little Shih Tzu. Yes, you've guessed it, Jake had raided the caddy in the night, and carried his 'treasure' to the living room. This treasure consisted of a hunk of stale bread, a wilted carrot, a banana peel and some potato peelings. His supper, costing £6.50 per 2 kg, sat untouched in his bowl.

Why, oh why, would a dog prefer manky old peelings and stale bread to premium salmon and potato flavoured dog food? Because he's a dog, I guess. I shall pin a note on to the fridge in a minute, as a permanent reminder to empty the wretched caddy each night, before I retire. Otherwise, my little treasure-hunter may embark upon another nocturnal raid. Let's see if he's as gleeful as he was, in a couple of hours' time - he's off to the groomers. Revenge is so sweet ...