Whistling kettles and Wayne-isms

I bought myself a whistling kettle yesterday. I'm sick of the fur-gathering electric one I have. Although I've used filtered water for the past year or so, the old fur inside the electric kettle refuses to go away, despite numerous attacks with lemon juice, vinegar or special limescale removers. I HATE furry kettles. So I bought a brand new, non-electrical one that can be scrubbed clean in a bowlful of hot, soapy water.

Anyway, I digress. I spoke to my cousin, Wayne, on the phone earlier. 'Can you hear the godawful racket my new kettle's making?' I said to him.
'Ooh', he replied. 'Is it a desktop one?'
'Yes, Wayne. It has a Pentium 4 processor and 1GB of RAM'.
I think he meant 'cooker-top'.

My new kettle has caused quite a stir with the cats. The first time I boiled it, Liberty clambered up on the kitchen table, and stood on her hind legs, meerkat-style, to get a look at what was whistling its head off. As for Leo, he ran to hide the first time he heard it whistling, and climbed onto the kitchen worktop to inspect it, the second time he heard it. I just wish I'd had my camera with me, as their faces were a picture.

Anyway, that's my wittering over and done with for now. I'll be back sometime in the foreseeable future, stroppy laptop permitting. If you're very lucky, I may even have something interesting to say.