Podcasting woes

I downloaded some audio editing software yesterday, and thought I'd do a bit of experimentation. I have an idea for a podcast, so I'm trying to record a few bits and pieces for it. Have you ever tried to create professional, studio-quality audio with a cat yowling on one side of you, a dog snoring and farting on the other side, not to mention fireworks whizzing around outside, and half the dogs in the neighbourhood voicing their disapproval of the aforementioned incendiary devices? Grr...

P.S. Does anyone know of a way to make dog farts smell less?