Weird Wednesday

Did you hear the one about the werewolves and the sculptures, the bishop and the aliens, and the brawling nuns? No? Well, read on.

Several Yorkshire residents were recently bemused by the appearance of carved stone heads, which were placed on their properties in the middle of the night. Each sculpture bears the same carved symbol and has a riddle attached.

CCTV captured images of a man depositing three heads outside a post office, but no-one recognised him. To date, twelve heads have popped up in North Yorkshire, four in West Yorkshire, and three in South Yorkshire.

The heads, no bigger than twelve inches high, all look different. But each one bears an identical carving, spelling out the word "paradox". Each one also comes with a note attached, which bears the riddle: "Twinkle twinkle like a star does love blaze less from afar?"

The villages where the heads have turned up are often up to 50 miles apart. Mike and Valerie Hoyes run the post office at Braithwell. On August 23rd, they found three heads outside the post office. Their CCTV footage revealed an unfamiliar man arriving in a small car, and depositing the carvings.

Publican Fiona Gould, of the Forresters Arms Hotel in Kilburn, received a carving in September. She relates how "he turned up ... between 1.30am and 7.30am. I opened the door and there he was, as large as life, sat on the patio." Her head now has pride of place behind the bar of her pub.

However, not everyone was as pleased with their gift. Some recipients were said to be convinced there was an occult influence at work. One woman even insisted werewolves were behind the matter. She was no doubt thinking about the famous Hexham Heads affair.

Today's Times reveals the true culprit to be a reclusive sculptor named Billy Johnson, who owns neither a television or a telephone. It is believed that Johnson has no idea he has been unmasked. According to his friend, Judy Alston, he left his gifts just to see how the recipients reacted. So the residents of Yorkshire can breathe a sigh of relief. Werewolves are not stalking them and no ancient curse will befall them.

Strange events have also been happening further afield. Roman Catholic bishop, Donald Pelotte, recently called police to his Gallup, New Mexico home, to evict some aliens he said were bothering him. He told the emergency dispatcher that some 3-4 feet tall little people wearing Halloween masks were in his hallway, and were refusing to leave. Police found the elderly bishop hiding in his closet. They found no signs of anyone else in his home. Sadly, the bishop recently suffered head injuries in a fall, which may or may not have been caused by intruders, and had spent some time in hospital prior to his report.

The final item in this week's Weird Wednesday, also has an ecclesiastical theme. A convent in Italy is to be closed down, following a vicious cat fight between its three nuns. Yes, you did read that correctly. I did say cat fight between nuns! Things became so nasty at the Santa Clara convent in Bari, that the Mother Superior required hospital treatment for facial scratches. The local archbishop stepped in, requesting the Vatican's permission to close the convent. Just the Mother Superior, Sister Liliana, remains at the convent, and insists she has no intention of leaving her home of 44 years.

The Clarissa nuns are reportedly the Catholic Church's strictest order. They devote their lives to prayer, penance and quiet contemplation. The vow of silence at the Santa Clara convent was shattered by a row of a most unholy nature. Sisters Annamaria and Gianbattista allege the nasty habits of their Mother Superior drove them scatty. She enraged them so much, they turned nasty, clawing her face and hurling her to the ground.

The two nuns have since moved to another convent. Sister Liliana remains barricaded inside Santa Clara. Archbishop Giovanni Battista Pichierri 's attempts to reconcile the three nuns, have failed miserably. In desperation, he wrote to the Holy See, stating that the nuns had "clearly lost their religious vocation" and as just one nun remains, the Archbishop is seeking permission to close Santa Clara down.

Sister Liliana, however, has other ideas, and after 44 years, is prepared to fight tooth and nail, to remain there. She has also written to the Pope, insisting she will only quit Santa Clara when God tells her to. Sister Liliana is devoted to her vow of silence, so she may prove a tough lady to negotiate with.

That's all for this week's Weird Wednesday. More whacky weirdness next week...